Practice democratic principles. Part 2

One of my responsibilities at Bethany Christian Schools is to run a middle school devotional group. This is a group of 10-12 6th-8th graders that meets once a week for 30 minutes with a teacher or staff person. This is my fourth year leading a group and in all honesty it is one of the most difficult things I do. I find myself struggling with the middle school age group. They tend to be highly negative, pessimistic, and critical towards each other and adults.

Earlier this year I noticed that the phrase "that is so gay" is used a lot by middle school students. This phrase is used to say things are dumb or stupid. In one of my recent devotional groups one student said the phrase multiple times, even after I told him not to. After the third time I stopped what we were doing and we had a conversation about what the phrase was implying and the undertones involved. The conversation turned into one of the best meetings we had all year. The students finally seemed to understand what they were saying and implying and we agreed, even if they thought homosexuality was wrong, that we wouldn't use the phrase anymore. Especially at a Christian school, our first calling is to show God's love to other people. I told them to use their words. To say what you mean, and mean what you say.

Become aware that you are a role model and act accordingly. Part 3

"A good coach will make his players see what they can be
rather than what they are." - Ara Parasheghian

When I first began coaching I realized quickly that I had a lot of eyes on my, watching everything I did and listening to everything I said. I especially felt this was true at the high school level. My first day of practice, my first year out of college, I was amazed to have 20 pairs of eyes looking at me as the authority figure.

On more than one occasion I have said something flippantly, not thinking much about it, only to have a player repeat what I said back to me. It didn't take long for me to realize that I had the power to impact lives both positively and negatively.

During my four years of coaching I have worked hard to be a positive influence in people's lives. Tennis is such an individual game and one of my biggest tasks is to be a cheerleader for beginning players. A lot of what I do during matches is try to encourage players to help them believe in their abilities.

A tradition I started last year was to do a weekly devotional with my team. Each Monday we start out the school week with a devotional. This has been a good way for me to share my faith with players as well as to talk about issues that are more important than tennis. After 7 seasons of tennis, in 3 1/2 years I know the most important things that happen have nothing to do with wins and loses. The relationships developed are far more important than anything else.

Become aware that you are a role model and act accordingly. Part 2

One way to be a role model is to attend church regularly. I grew up attending Goshen City Church of the Brethren, which is located in Goshen. My father and grandfather grew up in this church too, so we have a long history with the church. When I lived at home we went to church 3 times a week, Sunday mornings, Sunday evenings, and Wednesday evening. Sunday morning we went for worship services and Sunday school. Sunday evenings was for youth group and Wednesday evenings was a church meal and choir practice. My parents taught Sunday School faithfully for years and the example was set for me that attending church regularly is important.

When I started college and was off on my own for the first time it was difficult to convince myself to get up for church on Sunday mornings. The first semester of my freshman year I did a pretty good job a going somewhere with a few friends, but I quickly lost interest and it was much easier to get a few extra hours of sleep on Sunday mornings instead of getting up, getting ready, and driving to church.

Even though I enjoyed sleeping in, I started realizing that something was missing from my life without church. I missed the weekly worship services and a connection to a larger Christian community. During my sophomore year of college I was asked to help start a campus worship service for college aged students. College Mennonite church was interested in offering a service that would draw college students. The fruits of our labor was Morning Song, an 11am worship service, led by students. It was heavy on singing and also included a short homily. Most weeks I was helping with something in the service. Whether it was worship leading, giving a homily, or playing music, I was involved several times a month. The final three years of college were some of the most spiritually fulfilling times in my life. I loved being involved and felt nurtured in this setting.

Since I have finished college my husband and I have tried out many churches. We have been married for five years and still have not decided on a church home. I often end up at my home church as a default. We continue to look because we feel it is important to have a church home. Until then we will keep visiting and hopefully soon we will find a church to call home.

Become aware that you are a role model and act accordingly. Part 1

My mother was a science teacher for over 20 years. She developed an Environmental Science class at Bethany Christian Schools that focused on local ecosystems and our impact on the environment. I grew up in a home that recycled everything possible. We had several different stations in the kitchen. Some trash went directly into the trash can. Other food trash went into the container for the compost pile. Other pieces of trash were put in a bag to be recycled. We would be chastised if we put something into the wrong container. My mother hated the idea of anything being thrown away that could have been used for compost or recycled.

Since I am out of my parents house and living on my own I find myself doing the same things my mother did. My husband, Seth, grew up in a home that did some recycling, but the idea of sorting our paper, plastic, cardboard, glass, aluminum, newspaper, etc. is somewhat foreign. He doesn't understand why I get so mad when I find a stack of paper in the trash can. I find myself being as compulsive as my mother, but really feeling ok about it.

Become active in your community. Part 3

I have worked full time at Bethany Christian Schools since I graduated from college (the first time) four years ago. I have always been busy. The first three years I coached 2 seasons of tennis a year and this past year I agreed to be a class sponsor as well as adding college classes to my list of activities. My husband often accuses me of taking on too many things at one time!

This past year a friend of mine, who is the basketball coach at Bethany, asked if I would be willing to volunteer as the official book keeper for home girls basketball games. My initial instinct was to say no, because I am already doing enough. I changed my mind though because I decided it would be a good way to involve myself in another aspect of community life at Bethany. Being the official score keeper would get me out at basketball games and introduce me to a new set of athletes I normally don't have much interaction with.

I have been surprised over the past few months at how much I enjoy being the score keeper. I enjoy keeping track of the details of the game like personal fouls, team fouls, individual points, team points, timeouts, possessions, technical fouls, etc. I've realized a new love for the game of basketball and have met a lot of interesting book keepers from the opposing teams! I've found this form of volunteering to be a great way to stay active in my community.

Become active in your community. Part 2

I am a lifelong member of Goshen City Church of the Brethren. Growing up, my family went to church on Sunday mornings, Sunday evenings, and Wednesday evenings. I was baptized as an 8th grader and eventually married my husband in the church. As I finished college and entered the work force my church began asking me to serve on committees and help in worship services.

Goshen City Church of the Brethren is currently in the process of finding a new pastor. A few months ago I was asked to join a visioning team that would examine the current state of the church and make recommendations to the church about the direction we should take with our new pastor. Being a part of this team was a new experience for me. It involved gathering current and past information about the congregation, examining the data, working with a Church of the Brethren consultant, and making recommendations to the larger church.

We are currently finishing up this process and it continues to strike me that I do not feel qualified to assist in these kinds of decisions. I do not feel old enough or wise enough to offer counsel to the larger church. Even though I am 26 years old I still feel like a child within the church. I wonder at what point you begin to feel like an adult?

Become active in your community. Part 1

For the past four years I have coached two seasons of tennis. One at Goshen College in the fall and one at Bethany Christian High School in the spring. These two seasons are huge time commitments, but always end up being rewarding. I enjoy getting to know the players on my teams, working towards a common goal, and striving for improvement.

I take seriously the fact that each team is a representation of its school out in the larger community. It is important to me that as a team we represent our schools well by showing respect to each other, our opponents, coaches, and fans. While athletics has the potential to bring out the best in people, sports situations can easily bring to the surface heightened emotions. It is important to me that my players are always honest and respectful. Players actions leave an impression about the institution they are representing.

Just yesterday I had my callout meeting for spring tennis at Bethany Christian High School. I had 23 players come to the meeting and am excited to have my largest team ever this spring. We begin conditioning in one week and will start official, outdoor practices on March 16.